Despite recent campaign blunders, Rick Perry could still be president – of the Hair Club for Men.
Rick Perry said the regulatory world is killing us. But without EPA regulations, our air and water would be killing us.
Michele Bachmann blames Barack Obama's health care law for the nation's economic woes, although most of the law's provisions don't take effect until 2014. That's sad. I need that health care now because I'm sick of the presidential candidate debates.
Piers Morgan is stepping down as a judge of "America's Got Talent". Magician contestants said, "Piers, either leave on your own or we'll make you disappear."
Now that Piers Morgan is stepping down as a judge on "America's Got Talent", I think his replacement should be Larry King.
Larry King would be great as a judge on "America's Got Talent". If he doesn't think the acts are worth $1 million, he can change that by marrying or adopting the losers.
Piers Morgan is resigning as a judge on "America's Got Talent" because he needs more time for his show, "Piers Morgan Tonight". But since some of his guests are politicians, he can still tell people they're losers.
I understand the next season of "America's Got Talent" will feature the GOP presidential contenders. Now that they've had a million debates to voice their commitments to world peace, they need a venue for the swimsuit and talent competition.
Some bandits in San Diego stole some money from a display case in a casino. The casino owner said, "It's OK. We got it all back and more when those losers gathered around the craps table."
Jenni Farley, better known as JWOWW of "Jersey Shore" fame, contends she was singled out for a TSA scan in the Fargo, North Dakota, airport. She probably was singled out but not because she's famous. She was singled out because this time of year she was the only person visiting Fargo.