Wednesday, January 4, 2012

January marks the birthday of texting

On January 6, 1838, Samuel Morse sent the first message on the telegraph. That means he's the one we should blame for starting that obnoxious trend of texting.

January 8 is Bubble Bath Day. I wish you luck if you actually try to give a bubble a bath.

January 10 is supposed to be Peculiar People Day. But I'm thinking someone must have made a mistake because January 3 was the date of the Iowa Republican caucuses.

January 10 is Peculiar People Day. In my neighborhood, it's also January 11through January 9.

On January 11, 1973, American League baseball adopted the "Designated Hitter" rule. Today, the rule prevails among motorists in shopping mall parking lots.

January 14 is Dress Up Your Pet Day. Every day, my pet dresses more chic than I do because I don't own a fur coat.

On January 15, 1974, the show "Happy Days" premiered on TV. That show inspired me to become a comedy writer. I figured any one could write better jokes than Ralph Malph.

January 16 is National Nothing Day. Now ain't that something.

On January 21, 1976, "Baby Spice" of The Spice Girls was born. If she moved to Hollywood today and tried to re-launch her career, she could be called "Cougar Spice".

On January 29, 1954, Oprah Winfrey was born. What do you give someone like Oprah for her birthday? I'm giving her an opportunity to give me some of her millions.