I have been working with an incredible psychic healer. But his practice is limited. It does not include cards – specifically my American Express card.
I asked my psychic healer if I'd ever make it in the big time. He said my butt is already in the Kim Kardashian league.
I have the flu. I hate the fever, the headaches and the neck pain. However, I always have a pain in the neck. It's called a landlord.
If you decide to follow your dreams today, take the side roads because traffic is snarled on the Hollywood freeway.
I used to live in Seattle so everyone asks if I ever saw Bigfoot. I cannot tell a lie. The closest I came to ever seeing Bigfoot was looking at my ex-husband's foot, which was a size 13.
The acupuncturist looked at my tongue, felt my pulse and took my blood pressure. Then he diagnosed me in Korean. When I asked what was wrong, he said, "You need to hire me for more acupuncture."
January 23 is National Measure Your Feet Day. If you observe it, you might want to wash your feet first so your ruler won't end up smelling icky.
January 27 is National Punch the Clock Day. I probably won't celebrate it. I'm trying to get my anger management issues under control. So, I'm not angry with the clock.
If you celebrate National Punch the Clock Day on January 27, be careful so you won't injure your knuckles.
January 24 is National Compliment Day. I'll celebrate early by saying, "You are so nice I want to give you a gift that keeps on giving. So, here, take my flu."
SEE ME LIVE
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 23 – 9:30 PM (Theater)
"The Angel Academy" – written and directed by Chris Berube
Next Stage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
SATURDAY, JANUARY 26 – 2 PM (Standup)
Private Show – Million Laughs
Metropolitan State Hospital Prison Unit
Norwalk, CA
** If you would like to hire Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe for your next event, contact Will and Yvonne Morton at will@millionlaughs.com
SATURDAY, JANUARY 26 – 7 PM (Standup)
Private Show – Million Laughs
Little Flower Recovery Home
Bellflower, CA
** If you would like to hire Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe for your next event, contact Will and Yvonne Morton at will@millionlaughs.com
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 30 – 9:30 PM (Theater)
"The Angel Academy" – written and directed by Chris Berube
Next Stage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 6 – 9:30 PM (Theater)
The Angel Academy" – written and directed by Chris Berube
Next Stage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 23 – 2 PM (Standup)
Private Show – Million Laughs
Metropolitan State Hospital Prison Unit
Norwalk, CA
** If you would like to hire Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe for your next event, contact Will and Yvonne Morton at will@millionlaughs.com
