Laugh and don't worry if the rest of the world laughs with you

A stitch in time may save nine, but the seamstress will cost you ten.

I've been told a rolling stone gathers no moss. But, I want to get that confirmed by Mick Jagger.

It's been said, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away." But it actually just keeps Bill Gates from making a sale.

If it is better to give than to receive, who wants to give me $1 million?

There is a good reason the early bird caught the worm. The bird was first to arrive because it flew instead of taking the Hollywood freeway.

Rumor has it that for the want of a nail, a horse was lost. But, that stallion eventually was found clutching flowers and chocolates in his hooves just outside Nell the filly's stable.

If at first you don't succeed, blame it on your supervisor.

Whoever said, "See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil," never had to live with my ex-husband.

People keep asking me what's on my mind. Well right now my mind is wearing a bikini because it's pageant season and tonight is the swimsuit competition.

Members of the "t" party have crossed the line. And, it's a good thing they did because it would sound dumb to call them members of the lower case "l" party.


SEE ME LIVE:

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 28 – 2 PM
Private Show – Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe
Veteran's Hospital Spinal Cord Unit
Long Beach, CA
**If If you would like to book Million Laughs for a fund-raiser or private event, contact Yvonne or Will Morton at will@millionlaughs.com

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 28 – 6 PM
Private Show – Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe
Veteran's Hospital Blind Center
Long Beach, CA
** If you would like to book Million Laughs for a fund-raiser or private event, contact Yvonne or Will Morton at will@millionlaughs.com

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 8 – 2:00 PM
Private Show – Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe
Whitten Heights Assisted Living
La Habra, CA
** If you would like to book Million Laughs for a fund-raiser or private event, contact Yvonne or Will Morton at will@millionlaughs.com

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 29 – 8:30 PM
Private Show – Million Laughs Clean Comedy Troupe
Substance Abuse Foundation
Long Beach, CA
** If you would like to book Million Laughs for a fund-raiser or private event, contact Yvonne or Will Morton at will@millionlaughs.com