Top Ten Things Not to Say to Editors, Publishers and Agents

1. If you've got the money, honey, I've got the lines.

2. I'd love to tell you what my book is about, but it's a mystery.

3. I'm an experienced ghost writer. I've written scores of newspaper obituaries.

4. My goal is to be a cowboy poet. It's been my lifelong dream to be named poet lariat.

5. My book is great for bedtime reading. Just ask my ex-husband. He fell asleep reading the first page.

6. If I wanted to show and not tell, I'd write picture books.

7. My autobiography captures me from top to bottom. It has a weak beginning, an ample middle and a huge end.

8. When it comes to choosing a publisher, forget Doubleday. I'm holding out for Tripleday.

9. My book is so good it makes "Harry Potter" look like kid stuff.

10. I don't believe in making every word count. But I think they should be encouraged to sing, dance and do Pilates.


SEE ME LIVE
WEDNESDAY, MAY 15 – 9:30 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, MAY 17 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Open Mic
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $3 for open mic comedians
** $6 cover for audience
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Sign up at 10 PM. Limited to first 10-20 comedians. Acts need to be television clean.
*** NOTE: Comedians who attract paying audience members will get $1 per person – this is rare for an open mic
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages

TUESDAY, MAY 21 – 7:30 PM (Standup)
Do You Think You're Funny?
Produced by Cornelius Grant, original musical director for The Temptations
Barbara Morrison Performing Arts Center
4305 Degnan Blvd #101
Los Angeles, CA
** $10
** No item minimum purchase required
** Enter through the courtyard

WEDNESDAY, MAY 22 – 9:30 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, MAY 24 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Booked Showcase Hosted by Nancy Jo Perdue
Featuring:
     L.G. Ross
     J Scott
     Shayne Michael
     Kenny Jones
     Barry Weisenberg
     John Randall - headliner
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages

MONDAY, MAY 27 – 7 PM (Standup)
Comics on the Spot Show
The Warehouse
4499 Admiralty Way
Marina del Rey, CA
** $10 cover or two for one at $5 each
** No minimum item purchase required but amazing seafood food is available
** Valet parking

WEDNESDAY, MAY 29 – 9:30 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, MAY 31 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Open Mic
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $3 for open mic comedians
** $6 cover for audience
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Sign up at 10. Limited to first 10-20 comedians. Acts need to be television clean.
*** NOTE: Comedians who attract paying audience members will get $1 per person – this is rare for an open mic
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 5 – 8 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, JUNE 7 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Open Mic
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $3 for open mic comedians
** $6 cover for audience
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Sign up at 10. Limited to first 10-20 comedians. Acts need to be television clean.
*** NOTE: Comedians who attract paying audience members will get $1 per person – this is rare for an open mic
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 12 – 8 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, JUNE 14 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Open Mic
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $3 for open mic comedians
** $6 cover for audience
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Sign up at 10. Limited to first 10-20 comedians. Acts need to be television clean.
*** NOTE: Comedians who attract paying audience members will get $1 per person – this is rare for an open mic
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 19 – 8 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, JUNE 21 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Open Mic
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $3 for open mic comedians
** $6 cover for audience
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Sign up at 10. Limited to first 10-20 comedians. Acts need to be television clean.
*** NOTE: Comedians who attract paying audience members will get $1 per person – this is rare for an open mic
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 26 – 8 PM (Theater)
"Reservoir Bitches" – directed by Sydne Hebert
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** If you want Sunday School dialog and fairy tale endings, this show is not for you! But, it's a good one! Then again, the script was written by Quentin Tarantino.
(Due to popularity of this show, ticket prices are now $30. However, you can get a $10 discount if you tell them you came to see Nancy Jo! Go early because seating is first come, first served. Valet parking for $3.)

FRIDAY, JUNE 28 – 11 PM (Standup)
Nancy Jo's Jokebox Fridays
Booked Showcase Hosted by Nancy Jo Perdue
* Lineup of Featured Acts - Coming Soon
TreStage Theater
1523 N La Brea
Hollywood, CA
** $20 cash only
** Agents get in free by showing industry card
*** Arrive early as seating also is first come, first served. Valet parking $3.
*** Bring your own snacks and beverages