Free stuff will cost you

If the best things in life are free, that explains why insurance premiums are so expensive.

I'm great at multi-tasking.  Every time I dye my hair, I redecorate my bathroom.

Does the number of the color on the hair dye box correlate to the age the user is trying to be?

I love getting lifetime opportunities for free stuff you can get for three easy payments of $19.95.

If the three easy payments for those free lifetime opportunities were really easy, the people extending the offers would be making the payments for me.

I want to know how the person offering me a free hair transplant for three payments of $19.95 knew I needed new hair as a result of tearing out all of mine while trying to cope with the distraction of getting several costly offers for free hair.

President Barack Obama has a new dog named Sunny.  She loves to run especially when she sees Joe Biden approaching.

Why are blue plate specials at restaurants always served on white plates?

August 21 is National Senior Citizen's Day.  A lot of people look forward to being seniors so they can collect Social Security.  Some government officials call Social Security fixed income.  I wish they would fix it.

I'm looking forward to being a senior citizen so I can do all those things I haven't had time to do such as play Bingo, visit the grandchildren I don't have and travel to Canada for cheap prescriptions.

SEE ME LIVE

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 21 – 9:30 PM (Theater)

"Angel Academy" – Written and directed by Chris Berube

Next Stage Theater

1523 N La Brea

Hollywood, CA

** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo

** Agents get in free by showing industry card

** Valet parking for $3-5

SATURDAY, AUGUST 24 – 8 PM (Theater)

"Wonder Women" – Written and directed by Chris Berube

Next Stage Theater

1523 N La Brea

Hollywood, CA

** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo

** Agents get in free by showing industry card

** Valet parking for $3-5

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 28 – 8 PM (Theater)

"Angel Academy" – Written and directed by Chris Berube

Next Stage Theater

1523 N La Brea

Hollywood, CA

** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo

** Agents get in free by showing industry card

** Valet parking for $3-5

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 4 – 8 PM (Theater)

"Angel Academy" – Written and directed by Chris Berube

Next Stage Theater

1523 N La Brea

Hollywood, CA

** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo

** Agents get in free by showing industry card

** Valet parking for $3-5

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 11 – 8 PM (Theater)

"Angel Academy" – Written and directed by Chris Berube

Next Stage Theater

1523 N La Brea

Hollywood, CA

** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo

** Agents get in free by showing industry card

** Valet parking for $3-5

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 18 – 8 PM (Theater)

"Angel Academy" – Written and directed by Chris Berube

Next Stage Theater

1523 N La Brea

Hollywood, CA

** $20 cash only – tell them you came to see Nancy Jo

** Agents get in free by showing industry card

** Valet parking for $3-5

MONDAY, JANUARY 13, 2014 – 8 PM (Inspirational Speaking & Standup)

Private Event

Women Artists Network

Thousand Oaks, CA